Bar & Bat Mitzvah

Community You Can Believe In

Home > Community > Celebrate > Bar & Bat Mitzvah

We are honored to share with you both the preparation for Bar/Bat Mitzvah and the special day itself. We hope this will mark a milestone in a long partnership that will help nurture your family’s Jewish growth and make Beth El Temple a genuine spiritual home for you.

Looking for information for an adult bar or bat mitzvah? Click here!

Some Things to Think About

From experience we offer some thoughts and suggestions as you think about this day:

You are creating memories. Your child will remember this day for the rest of his/her life. Do everything possible to make it positive, enriching and meaningful for family harmony and in Jewish ways, as well.
Children watch parents closely and they generalize. The manner in which you prepare for the day communicates your values. Therefore, in addition to planning carefully for receptions and new clothing, we encourage you to also devote time and resources to the Jewish celebration that Bar/Bat Mitzvah is. Attend more services than necessary. Make sure that fathers -- and mothers, too, if they want -- have their own Tallit (ritual shawl worn by Jews) and Kippah (headcovering). Start eating Challah (ritual bread) on Friday nights and say the Hamotzi (blessing over bread). Such actions will broadcast "my family cares about Judaism. It must be important." We are happy to help you become comfortable with any of these rituals.
Use this time to deepen your child’s appreciation of your family’s history. Discuss your child’s Hebrew name. For whom is he or she named? What kind of person was this ancestor? What qualities would you as parents hope your child might emulate from your family’s past? If you or child does not have a Hebrew name please consult with the rabbis.

All Are Welcome

Our Beth El Temple welcomes family members of other faiths and will find a way to include them in a meaningful, inclusive experience. We are also committed to working with individuals with special needs to craft an experience that is both meaningful and appropriate.

You Might Enjoy Reading

For more enriching ideas see “Putting God on the Guest List: How to Reclaim the Spiritual Meaning of Your Child's Bar or Bat Mitzvah” by Rabbi Jeffrey Salkin or “Bar/Bat Mitzvah Basics: A Practical Family Guide to Coming of Age Together” by Cantor Helen Leneman. For what to expect at a Bar or Bat Mitzvah, check out this page from My Jewish Learning.

For More Information

For more information concerning Bar/Bat Mitzvah preparation, contact our office at (860) 233-9696.

ADULT BAR/BAT MITZVAH

Adult Bar/Bat Mitzvah is a program designed for those who did not have a bar/bat mitzvah as a child or who want a more meaningful experience the second time around.

It includes intensive study of Hebrew language and an exploration of many important themes in Jewish history, culture, holidays, literature, and practice. Students learn to chant from the Torah and Haftarah as well as to lead services in preparation for the culminating event, the Adult Bar/Bat Mitzvah, held on a Shabbat morning with the entire congregation invited.

Contact Rabbi Ilana Garber at (860) 233-9696, ext 104 for more details.

Thu, April 2 2020
8 Nisan 5780

Community

Upcoming Events

All Events

Thursday ,
AprApril 2 , 2020

Cancelled: Updates from Israel: Latest Developments in Cancer Research, Revitalizing the Land and Robotics
Thursday, Apr 2nd 7:00p to 8:30p
**This event has been cancelled out of an abundance of caution.** Enjoy learning about these latest developments while sampling delicious Israeli wines and kosher cheeses. Our guest speakers are: Dr. Mark Israel, National Executive Director of the Israel Cancer Research Fund. Dar Nadler of the Jewish National Fund Haim Dribin and his Roboner students from the Misgav Regional High School
Register Now

MORE INFO
Friday ,
AprApril 3 , 2020

Postponed: Direct from NY: a Spirited B’nai Jeshurun-style Shabbat Service
Friday, Apr 3rd 7:00p to 9:00p
**This special service is being postponed out of an abundance of caution. We look forward to rescheduling this event when guidance from health officials suggests it is wise to do so. Come to an evening of singing, with guitar, clarinet, and accordion. This Erev Shabbat Service with virtuoso instrumental accompaniment will be in the style of the B'nai Jeshurun Synagogue in Manhattan. Music that hopefully brings us closer to God, to each another, and to our spiritual yearnings.
MORE INFO
Monday ,
AprApril 6 , 2020

Serve a Meal with Loaves & Fishes Ministries
Monday, Apr 6th 10:00a to 12:45p
On the first Monday of each month, a group from Beth El helps prepare and serve a meal in conjunction with the Loaves and Fishes Ministries Soup Kitchen. It’s a chance to share our bounty and spend time with our Hartford neighbors, and a chance to catch up with each other. We welcome new participants. For more information, contact Ellen Solomon at (860) 648-0300 or email at Gingy81434@hotmail.com.
MORE INFO
Wednesday ,
AprApril 8 , 2020

Fast of the First Born Breakfast
Wednesday, Apr 8th 8:00a to 9:00a
From MyJewishLearning.com: The sunrise to sunset ta’anit (fast) bekhorim (of the firstborn) is the only fast that applies to just a segment of the community: all males who are the firstborn children in their families (if the firstborn child is female, the first son born after her is not obligated). The father of a child too young to fast fasts for him, and if he himself is bekhor, the mother fasts for the child on the day of Erev Pesach [the day in which Passover begins at nightfall]. Since it is forbidden to abstain from eating on Shabbat (except for Yom Kippur), when Erev Pesach falls on Saturday night, the fast takes place on Thursday. There is a widely practiced exemption: On the principle that fasting is prohibited on a joyous occasion, Judaism allows for anyone who attends a religious feast to forego fasting. It is customary to hold a celebratory meal on the completion of study of a tractate of Talmud, called a siyyum (conclusion). So rabbis initiated the practice of studying a portion of a Talmud tractate after morning services, held especially early on Erev Pesach. All the firstborn are invited to be present for the conclusion and share cake and schnapps afterward, considered a seudat (meal) mitzvah (in honor of a commandment; in this case, studying the Torah).
MORE INFO
Saturday ,
AprApril 11 , 2020

Shabbat of Gathering
Shabbat, Apr 11th 9:30a to 1:00p
Beth El’s first Shabbat of Gathering (SoG) was a great success. Our community came together and, with a big leap of faith, we sat with people we did not know. And while we munched on bagels, blintzes, and more, we shared, we listened, we put names and stories with faces. Even when the last notes of Birkat Hamazon were sung, many of us stayed at our tables, talking. The on-line survey reviews proved what we had seen: the vast majority loved the experience and wanted more! “Our table could have used more time. Can you push the mincha service even later?” “I loved the questions.” “The random seating led to great mixing.” “Even if you knew people, you came away with something about them you didn’t know.” We will be hosting another Shabbat of Gathering on Saturday, April 11. It’s during Pesach. If you attended our launch program, we hope you’ll come back for a festive Passover lunch and some wonderful conversation. And if you’re not a regular at Shabbat services, think about joining in. You never know who you’ll meet, what new friends you’ll make!
MORE INFO